“Thappad” Just a Slap. Which is more important Self-respect or Love?

No matter how much we pretend to come from a developing country, the true status of society will give you chills. Especially when the question status of women comes. Women are not given equal freedom when it comes to making individual decisions. The mentality that women are not worthy enough to get trusted.  They are being judged for every small to a big decision.

When I do something on my own, my family and friends become overprotective. Though I’m lucky enough that they are not overpowering. Yes, there’s the minute line between overprotective and overpowering. Which side of the court are you living?

Women in Indian society be it affluent or from the slums are in some way connected to each other, excluding exceptional. Domestic violence occurs in both affluent and slums. If you don’t agree with me, it means you don’t want to see the real face of society.

Here women from poor backgrounds don’t have any choice. On the other hand, women from rich families have the choice to take a stand, but only a few have the courage to raise their voices. Either they are under pressure from family, afraid to get judge, for the sake of their children and other countless boundations. Whom do you consider less privileged?

The recently release Thappad movie gives an impactful social message. “Just one Slap” is considered normal in our society and women too support this.

Okay, so I’m not giving a typecast movie review that you have read across various websites. But I want to thanks director Anubhav Sinha’s for sparking the less talked domestic violence issue and it’s the emotional and psychological impact on women.

30% of Indian women have been physically, sexually or emotionally abused by their husbands. 54.8% of women (40-49yr) justified the abusive behavior of husband and 47.7% of teenage girls also support the same.

National Family Health Survey (NFHS) in 2018 data

The problem is deeply rooted in the mindset of our society where a ‘slap’ or similarly abusive behavior is considered as casual in a normal married relationship.

How much is too much and who draws the line whether it’s acceptable or not?

To give you answers to these questions, Taapsee Pannu’s Thappad will give you a first-hand encounter of what happens to a wife when she is subjected to domestic violence. How offensive behavior totally destroys the pride of a woman.

Amrita (Taapsee Pannu) advocate asked her “why she’s leaving her husband for ‘just a slap’”. Amrita replied, ‘Yes it was “Just a slap”, but no, he can’t do it.’ The movie has become the voice of the woman who comes face offense in day to day life. 

The protagonist of Thappad, Amrita’s (Taapsee Pannu) life revolves around Vikram’s needs like any other middle-class women. When her husband slap across her face at a party she questioned why a slap is a forgivable offense?

The title message “Thappad – bas itni si baat” questioned the less talked domestic violence?  Being a human what do you think is it okay that a husband to slap his wife and should be forgiven?

Though Vikram is not a bad guy and represents the men in the majority who take it one ‘casual slap’ and expects his wife to move on. On the other hand, Amrita who’s struggling to stand up what she believes in.

The protocols of Indian marriage where women are conditioned to remain silent for the sake of patriarchy. From mother to friend to neighbor and even helping hands belives that “Shit it happens” and being women we should have to live with it. Common phrases like “Bardaasht Karna” “Ghar zyada zaruri hain” “log kya kehenge” etc resembles the mindset of society.

The writer writers Anubhav Sinha and Mrunmayee Lagoo weave a narrative that, become the story about every next woman. They narrate stories of women with different perspectives and the double standard of society.

Amrita’s mother (Ratna Pathak ) gave up dreams of being a singer because according to her it’s compulsory to comprise in marriage and wants her daughter to do the same.

Amrita’s father (Kumud Mishra) who don’t support his wife’s dreams but stood up for his daughter. Amrita’s mother-in-law (Tanvi Azmi) who’s in search of her identity within a loveless marriage.

The neighbor (Dia Mirza) a widow madly in love with her late husband and believe no man can ever match up to him.  The brother’s girlfriend (Naila Grewal) first one to back Amrita realizes the one she is in love doesn’t understand why it hurts. Amrita’s house help who satisfy her soul that if domestic violence occurs among rich than where she stands?

The power-packed performances by the whole cast strongly put forward the impactful social message. When Amrita says “I turned myself into the person who could be slapped” This hit hard and brings the sense of self-awareness among women.

Though in the climax of Thappad I found the director less visionary in translating the ending.

मुझे अपने जीने का हक़ चाहिए,
ज़मीं जिस पे मेरे क़दम टिक सकें
और तारों भरा कुछ फ़लक चाहिए
मुझे अपने जीने का हक़ चाहिए

– अमजद इस्लाम अमजद

Yet, the moves bring a solid point enough to ponder upon. In our society’s age-old belief women have to compromise in marriages and small issues are overlooked. This movie sparked the discussion that “Just one” slap hurts.

Refrences:
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2968709/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/intl/blog/insight-is-2020/201207/how-define-physical-abuse-in-relationships-slap-push